A Love Hate Relationship

Communication is an important thing in a relationship. For the past two weeks the communication between my computer and me has been strained to say the least. It has a virus, which means my computer is saying "Im sick" and I say "What the Fuck, a virus?". Every time my computer shuts down or a program freezes I want to take my computer and destroy it, I want to set it aflame Hendrix style, I want to smash it in an orgy of violence. Now, don’t get me wrong I loved my computer and it holds major sway over what I do and when I do it. It is my source for news, music, communication and pictures of naked girls. Since its acquisition I have grown increasingly attached to it. For the most part I have been able to keep my "Comp" as I affectionately call it running smoothly. However, in the past I have had my computer related emergencies and they hit hard, so hard that everything else was put on hold until my comp was up and running again. (I still remember the first time I had to reboot it and how I stopped going to class) Maybe it's more of a personality trait than a reliance on my computer that makes everything else secondary until my computer is fixed. Anyway, my computer has had a virus and it’s ruining my life, or more appropriately slowing it down. I don’t know about anyone else but when I get a virus or when my comp is crudded up, it is a total bitch to work with. I already have no patience, and waiting for a page to load or watching letters slowly appear on the screen seconds after they have been typed is a living hell. Plus, I keep running anti-virus software and I even purchases and anit-spyware program which is utterly unheard of and illustrates my desperation. In the past I have never purchased software I would sooner spend hours finding a crack to steal it. In this case trying to find a useable crack for anti-virus software resulted in downloading another virus. I’m almost insane with anger and I wish I could go back in time and purchase a Mac. I have a short fuse, no patience and I'm frustrated as hell because of this shit. In reality this virus isn’t doing anything except pissing me off, my computer is usable but just knowing that there is as virus is enough to make me grind my teeth. I could be worse; it could be a virus that actually does something bad like destroy my Mp3's or rearrange my keyboard. I would almost enjoy the theatratics of a mega virus that throws up an 80's style 3D rendered skull and crossbones with 8bit sounds of hellish laughter and floating radioactive signs. When I was younger, I thought computer hackers and viruses were just like that. I can almost convince myself that a virus like that would be better that what I got now; at least I would be entertained.